Astral Boutique's blog

Triple WTF?

Today my International Correspondent/Eyes On The Street, Joanne, brings us this triple threat of WTFs from Europe:

Danish WTF?! It means "final run", or in this context "end of sale".. no idea about the "me too"- personally I prefer to get drunk and shop online.. ;) 

In order to fit on a supermarket price tag, "assorted" gets unfortunately abbreviated, with alarming implications for Welsh Ladies everywhere...

Aye! I'm TOTALLY ready! For some "camp" with "chicory," which I enjoy on a folding chair outside my military pup tent, with my trusty Sikh valet, who stirs the glutinous substance into cupfuls of boiling water and heated milk for me (as is his wont) and dresses me daily in my kilt, sporran and socks while I sit brokeback mountain style and wonder whether my hat and socks are more traditional than effete, and how much whiskey is exactly in this stuff.

*Thanks Joanne for Keeping It Weird!*

WTF?- from Astral Boutique's UK Correspondent, Joanne

Astral Boutique's eyes and ears abroad, Joanne, is back for another installment of "International WTF?"!

WTF?! you may say, but hey, it’s an English tradition.

There being a square-foot-related dearth of dishwashers in England we all preserve our hands by wearing rubber washing-up gloves while we slop our dirty dishes in the sudsy water.. and said gloves of course cum in handy for all sorts of other purposes too.

Here you have the medium size pink Cumfie... patterned for grip (in case you should slip on the foamy kitchen floor, one imagines), with a rolled cuff simply for the panache of it, and flock lined so your hands will stay as warm and clammy as a seagull’s webbed foot in the steaming kitchen.. we wouldn’t want to dry out now, would we?

 

WTF?- Astral Boutique's UK Correspondent, Joanne, Comes Stateside

Look out America- they have let Joanne into the country! She is eventually headed West, (where I am finally going to get to meet her in person!), but meanwhile, she has a lot of America to cover, including some prime WTF territory in Texas. First off, though, she is spending time on the Eastern Seaboard, where she brings us this:

 

Spotted in Whippany, New Jersey, vintage pinball machine... notice the 80's haircut flyboy with welder's gloves on burning his overly well-endowed girlfriend's arm with a cigarette while uttering the phrase "mission accomplished"... and why does he have a bowtie on with his uniform? Puzzler...

Thanks Joanne! We are eager for your next discovery!

WTF?- From Astral Boutique's UK Correspondent, Joanne

Breaking news: Joanne Mildenhall has just been named the official Astral Boutique UK correspondent. Now, it takes more than sharp dress sense and an uncanny resemblance to style icon Charlotte Gainsbourg (Joanne gets stopped frequently on the streets of London for autographs! She ought to charge!) to become my official correspondent. It takes KEEN EYES, my friends, keen eyes. Let's take a look at what she has found for us today.

Spotted on ancient dispensing machine in Carnaby Street public toilet:

I asked Joanne what on earth she thinks was inside this "Vanity Pack". 

I have NO IDEA! It was totally empty! I'm guessing it contained a toothbrush, disco-themed thong, bronzing powder, Dallas sticker, cigarettes and hairspray?

(Now this is the kind of investigative journalism we aim for here at Astral Boutique.)

The tiles by the basins are hilarious too- check it!

 

Just to seal the deal, Joanne provided this photo of a French Big Eyed Boy, taken inside a London vintage shop. Note the DICE. We are talking vices here, people.

 

Joanne- WTF? And thank you.